Maple Hotel & Apartment

Garbage Hole You know, there is a psychologist called Veronika Stepanova. She advises: if you don’t know if you can do something, just ask yourself: “Can I?” and answer: “I can.” Apparently, this wonderful hotel in Vietnam once asked itself this question. “Can we give ourselves 4 stars, even if we don’t even qualify for minus 3?” And, of course, it answered: “We can!” Because it had never seen any international ratings. On the first floor is the restaurant “Okinawa.” Dear comrades, are you serious? “Okinawa” doesn’t even know what garbage hole you’ve given it its name. Please, rename the establishment to something more appropriate. “Bedbug infested”? “A pleasant surprise”? At least don’t mislead people. But the most surprising thing is that the breakfasts, contrary to expectations, were not so terrible. After what we saw in the hotel, we were sure that we would be fed exclusively with spiritual rats. But no! Some of it was even edible. This is perhaps the most unexpected compliment that can be given to this place. We arrived at night. Of course, there is no 24-hour reception, as stated in the description. You will be met by some strange guy running out of the parking lot, who will immediately start demanding a $150 deposit from you. Although the room will indicate that the deposit is 500 thousand Vietnamese dong. After a long argument, he will agree to the official amount, take the money, demonstratively snort, and you will be left alone with your luggage. When you enter the room, you will see such dirt that you have never seen even in your darkest nightmares. Everything you see in the photos of the hotel has nothing to do with reality. Absolutely everything is dirty here. It feels like they have a special service for dirtying rooms. The first night passed in a state of slight shock. We arrived late, and the next day we ran away to a normal five-star hotel to at least come to our senses a little. Then, by an unfortunate coincidence, we had to come back for one more night, but our patience snapped, and we ran away for good, without even waiting for the end of the paid period. About breakfasts. We decided to try this experiment only once. Perhaps, in contrast to the hotel, they even seemed good to us. But we decided not to risk it a second time. At least something good should remain in our memories. Now about the pluses. No, we will not talk about the rooms, elevators, corridors and balconies - they are so terrible that it is unpleasant even to describe them. The view from the window? Only if you have dreamed all your life of looking at the wall of a neighboring building through cloudy, dirty glass. The hotel is located in such a way that taxis do not drive up to it - a prohibiting sign. So be prepared to drag your suitcases from the highway yourself. At the reception, they did us a special "service": they decided to check our room when we checked out. What exactly they were looking for there is a mystery. Perhaps they wanted to make sure that it was impossible to spoil it even more. But there was also a pleasant surprise: they returned our forgotten sneakers. This touched us so much that we almost gave it an extra star. But when I went up to get my sneakers, the maid was already sitting in the room, peacefully scrolling through her phone, comfortably settled on the bed. Clean? Why? Nothing can help the room in such a state. If this hotel is participating in a competition for the title of the worst in the world, it is confidently moving towards victory. If Dante were alive, he would add another circle of Hell - and it would be this hotel. ⸻

It is a few minutes walk from the main road, and there is no other access, and I wish they would pay more attention to the cleanliness of the guestroom bathroom. The toilet smells linger. The bathroom glass wall is connected to the room, so the bedroom becomes brighter when used at night. Other than that, it is generally acceptable.